Some Tips For Resolving Couple Conflicts
When we share our life with someone, sooner or later the discussions come, it is normal. The different points of view, the misunderstandings, the frictions of the routine, the stress that everyday problems cause … all this can lead to discussions and quarrels, making it necessary to find the right tools to resolve couple conflicts.
The first thing to keep in mind is that, generally, we unload the accumulated tension on the person closest to us. On many occasions, our partner pays the price for your conflicts at work, the stress of rush hour or the complicated evening spent with the kids. The first thing you need to do to resolve relationship conflicts is to think about what is really bothering you. Don’t be impulsive, stop and think before you act.
Some tips for resolving couple conflicts
Wait .. there is no rush!
It is not always advisable to talk about things on the fly, even more so when it comes to a sensitive and recurring topic of your discussions. When this happens, you are more irascible and it will be impossible for you to see the situation from the right perspective. You don’t have to ignore the fight, just propose to take some time to relax and talk when things have calmed down a bit.
Active listening to resolve couple conflicts
Have you ever heard about it? It simply means learning to listen. Sounds very easy, doesn’t it? It really isn’t. Apparently, during an argument, most people focus more attention on the answer to give. In this case, active listening invites you to focus on the person you are talking to, without judgment and without expectations.
This exercise, which you should do on a daily basis, will be particularly useful when discussing with your child.
Respect first of all
Whatever happens, remember not to attack your partner, either physically or verbally, and not to disrespect him. People with a more irritable temperament tend to explode more easily and may say things they later regret, blaming the anger of the moment. The damage is therefore done and this will mark the trend from now on will take the quarrels.
Go all the way in marital conflict
If you have a problem, fix it, don’t leave in the middle of the discussion. This behavior causes your partner’s self-esteem to falter, making them believe you don’t care. Always try to do the opposite, reminding him that you want to come to an agreement with him and that the relationship really matters to you.
Everyone is wrong
Be humble, question yourself, because, even though you think you haven’t done anything to spark the fight, there can always be the possibility that you have hurt your partner’s feelings, even unknowingly. Again, listen actively and be patient.
Don’t generalize
When we find ourselves in a discussion, very often we make the mistake of saying phrases like: “You always …” or “You never …” and this, of course, is not true. Focus on the problem in front of you, without associating it with other moments or previous discussions.
Speak from the point of view of the ego
Another important key to resolving relationship conflicts is to talk about how you feel. Try not to point the finger at your partner, avoid criticism, reproaches and accusations and try to analyze your faults as well. The other person wants to know what you feel and not what you think about him.
“When this happens, I feel like this…” is an example of a suitable phrase to explain what you feel without judging the other person. In addition, in this way you will talk about your feelings and your needs, so that you can make your partner better understand the reactions that certain attitudes cause on you.
Do not ask for what you cannot give
We always have a tendency to ask too much, without thinking about what we are giving. If you demand something, you must be willing to give the same, only in this way will you build a balanced couple.
Very often, we unfairly take it out on our partner, making a very serious and frequent mistake. No one can fill your voids, only yourself and this can lead to frustration that affects your relationship.
Having discussions is normal, but it is important to find a healthy way to resolve these couple conflicts.
