Survival Manual For Single Moms
Have you just gotten out of a divorce? Or is your child’s father not coming to live with you and you have no idea what to do as single moms ? We know that this was probably not the situation you expected to find yourself in and that you now feel adrift.
For this reason we have created a survival manual for single moms for the first few months. It is in this phase that the emotions are most negative, as well as the strongest is the feeling of being lost. Remember that you are not alone and that you can always choose how to deal with the situation.
Connect with other single moms
There will be many occasions when, as a single mom, you will feel lost. This is normal, due to the fact that most of the responsibility will fall on you. For this reason, it is very important to spend time with other single moms to help, inspire and accompany you.
These reports will help you understand how they dealt with the situation. They will give you suggestions, they will help you to dispel doubts, they will accompany you when your mood is not the best and, when you need it, they will offer you their support.
All of this doesn’t mean that, as a single mom, you need to isolate yourself from the rest of your friends and family. Now, however, you can broaden your circle and connect with other women who are experiencing the same doubts and fears as you.
Together with them, you will be able to talk about things that, perhaps, other people are not able to understand well, because they have not experienced them.
Leave the relationship with your ex behind
There are many reasons why a woman can become a single mom. If your case is due to the end of a love relationship, it is important that you step forward and leave this story behind.
The first few months after a divorce can be painful, and you will find yourself going through a whirlwind of emotions. Give yourself time to feel those feelings, but never speak badly of your ex to your children (unless, of course, there are problems with mistreatment or abuse). Remember that he continues to be a part of their life and that it will always be like this.
At first you will think that you don’t have the skills to move forward: in reality, you just have to give yourself some time to organize your new life. At this stage, you will find it difficult to see your ex when he visits your children, but remember that this is his right as well as an obligation, so just put up with the situation.
Quickly bring normalcy into your life
After a divorce or separation, you may find yourself eating only frozen cereals and meals. Yes, we know that you are feeling depressed, but the sooner you can regain control, the sooner you will start moving forward again.
Your divorce or separation has already passed and your ex is no longer with you. What you are left with is the responsibility towards your children and yourself. Consequently, you have to create a new routine. Start cooking homemade food, go out to the park, get back to exercising and spend time with your children.
They will understand if you spend all your time complaining, forgetting about everything else. All of this will bring them a pile of negative feelings, even if they are very small. Remember that your children need rules, order and a well-structured home.
Choose optimism
You need to see life with optimism and enthusiasm, for yourself and for your children. Remember that they will see life and live it the way they see you doing it, and it is very likely that you want a full and happy life for them. It is not so? In this case, as a single mom you need to be ready to overcome any obstacles.
If you are optimistic, your children will learn that even if their parents are separated, their family is not broken. If you have more than one child, teach them that they are not alone and that they belong to each other. This will give them confidence and show them that you too have faith in them.
If, on the other hand, you have only one child, you have the opportunity to teach him to be self-sufficient. Don’t forget to spend time with him though.
Being a single mom isn’t the end of the world
Who knows: maybe your first thought on seeing yourself as a single mom is that you won’t make it. Relax and, for a moment, think of nothing. Then, calmly, begin to examine the situation and observe it from another point of view.
Forget the criticisms, fights and any other negative moments. Now they are of no use to you: what you need is to focus on the present. You don’t have to see your new situation as the end of the world, but rather as a new challenge.
